George Harris KC Star Reader Advisory Panel 2008

We couldn’t have known how the notice on the bulletin board would change our lives.

It was lunch time on an August day in 1994. I went to a deli across the street from my office to grab a sandwich, and there it was. A flier on the bulletin board announced that homes were still needed for American Field Service exchange students who were on their way to the U.S. for the fall semester.

My wife and I had casually discussed having an exchange student but had never done anything about it. What the heck, I thought, I’ll make the call and get information.

By the end of the afternoon, I had fax resumes of three students. I brought them home to my unsuspecting wife. We reviewed them and decided to take the next step, so we called to discuss matters further. A whirlwind of calls and interviews followed, and within a few days we were expectant AFS parents.

Le (short for Leandro) was our first exchange student. We took a Brazilian flag to greet him the day we picked him up at William Jewell College. He was tentative at first, but within a few hours, we knew we had made a good decision.

Our relationship with Le quickly became second nature. Le loved sports. He knew who Joe Montana was and eagerly went to Chiefs games with me. He loved electronic gadgets. He played the piano. We took him to Los Angeles and saw a Lakers game. His English, already good, improved, and he was a good student. He loved Beavis and Butthead and Mad Magazine and laughed easily with people. The year passed so quickly.

The day arrived for Le to return to his family in Brazil. We dreaded it. We knew he had to return to his home, but he felt like our own. I was afraid I would never see him again. When he boarded the bus with the other students to take the traditional cross country trip for AFS students to decompress and transition to their home countries, I thought I might need some IV Prozac. I have seldom felt so sad.

That evening Le called from his first stop. He called again the next day from the airport. He called again when he arrived in Brazil.

In the years since 1995 when Le left as a student, there has seldom been more than a week pass without a phone call or e-mail. Now we have Skype for internet phone calls with web cams.

We have twice visited Le, his parents and his wife in Brazil. We decided not to go to Brazil for his wedding, fearing that we would be an intrusion in his family’s special time. But we went for Christmas two years ago. He has returned six times for visits, leaving this last Sunday with his wife, Eve, and baby Lauren. We had met Eve twice before, once at Christmas and once when they came here for a visit before their wedding. Eve is beautiful and as easy to love as Le.

Before Le's most recent visit, we had seen Lauren only on the web cam. The flier on the bulletin board in 1994 did not advise us of the excitement we would have holding Lauren or the fun of her play with us. I could not have imagined the satisfaction of watching Le patiently feeding his baby and consoling her when she cried. And we weren't at all warned about the ache we felt when Le, Eve and Lauren left this week.

The only thing that keeps me from going into a deep depression now is that I know we will see them again. Plans are already in progress for the next trip. A reunion in Florida or maybe Mexico.

AFS parents can’t replace a student’s real parents of course, but love isn’t restricted by biology. We have hosted students now from Norway, Germany, Costa Rica and Brazil, and the bonds with each of them are special and unique. Kaja from Norway visited us after her father died, and we were fortunate to visit Moritz and his family in Germany before his father developed cancer and died. Arman from Costa Rica was actually a student we met while he was staying with another family in the U.S., but he returned to Kansas City and stayed with us for three months to work and make money to go to dental school. It is hard now to imagine our lives without knowing them all.

If you are at all inclined, now would be a good time to consider hosting an exchange student. Students from around the world have been planning this last year for their American adventure and will be arriving later this summer, needing homes and love of a family.

But beware. Having an exchange student in your home can change your life, leaving you with joy, the sadness of separation and the hope of reunions to come.